Single people dream of being married. Married people fantasize about being single. The truth is most of us like the idea of being in a relationship more than the reality of what it takes to make it work. When we look to other people to satisfy our deepest desires, we end up disappointed. Disappointment leads to deprivation, and dissolution follows close at hand. This is not what God intended. Marriage and singleness are both gifts from God that lead to His ultimate objective – GRACE.

Answers and Boundaries

The Corinthian Church put together a list of questions for the great Apostle Paul. Questions like: Is it ok to be single? What about widows remarrying? Are single people more spiritual than married people? Is it better to be celibate? … and so on. Paul spends 6 chapters preaching to them BEFORE he begins to answer any of their sanitized concerns. Quite often, there is a huge difference between the questions we ask and the REAL issues we are dealing with. God is not nearly as concerned about answering our questions as He is in dealing with our issues.

Duty and Grace

Duty – is this the most unromantic sounding word ever? It is interesting that God doesn’t say anything about fulfilling sexual DESIRE. Why? It’s because desire is intended to be a by-product – not a goal. What’s He saying? It’s not about you! Desire can light a fire, but only duty can keep it burning. If you are single, your singleness is a gift from God. If you are married, your marriage is also a gift from God. Both relational positions are A gift, but THE greatest gift is grace. No matter which gift you have, you’re gonna need grace.